The 'I Am Not Me' Feeling: I Want My Old Self Back
“I am not me”. How many of you have been feeling that? Or have felt that in the past? At some point in life, we all have felt this in different intensities depending on what made us feel so. “I am not me”, why would someone say that? How can someone not be themselves? It’s Ironic indeed. But, this feeling has its own explanation for its existence. I am going to explain you more about this feeling in this article.
The “I am not me” feeling kicks in when you suddenly change drastically as a result of some incident that hit you real hard. An incident that changes more than half of your personality, the way you see things, the way you perceive things, your beliefs, your faiths, your positivity, and the list goes on…
This feeling lowers your self-worth to a dangerously low level, a level that can be considered similar to zero. You may be liked by many people, you may be doing well at your work place, but, something always stops your self-worth from growing. And trust me, a low self-worth will never ever let you be ‘actually’ happy and satisfied in your life.
You may achieve everything you want, you may become everything you want to be, you may have everything you want to have in your life, but, you will still be unhappy because you won’t have the basic thing required to be happy – self-worth. How is a person supposed to be happy when one is not satisfied by oneself? How will someone be happy when one feels worthless to oneself? Self-worth is a big thing indeed.
I don’t know if it’s right to call it depression, but, I feel it’s something close to it. Imagine a life where you strive to be a perfectionist every single day just to raise your standards in the eyes of your own. There might be many people who love you, adore you, admire you, think of you highly, you might have many friends to laugh with, but, at the end of the day when it’s only you with yourself, the worthlessness kicks in. You feel worthless in front of your own self…
You might be thinking that we were supposed to be talking about the ‘I am not me’ feeling, where did self-worth get in? Well, a person becomes low on self- worth only when one had been really high on self-worth. There are incidents that shatter you, that don’t meet your expectations, that hurt your self-worth so bad, that you struggle hard to get it back and still fail every time. The root cause of lowering of self-worth is not being able to meet your own expectations…the expectations that you had from yourself, and the society comes together to make you feel more like a failure. No matter how confident you were, how intelligent you were, how talented you were, once you shatter your own expectations, the most significant ones, you will lose all your self-worth. You will feel more like a useless piece of disappointment to yourself and to everyone you know. This lack of self-worth shatters all your amazing qualities, your confidence, your will power, your positivity, your hope….everything that once meant a lot to you.
But, if you have been feeling low on self-worth, my dear, you are not alone. I’m sure there are many out there struggling to get back their old self, which was strong, positive, confident, enthusiastic, and most importantly had a high self-worth. You might not be comfortable in your skin right now, because of what is inside, but, Clouds are not forever, sooner or later the sun shines bright. Your self-worth returns to you or not, is totally dependent on you. You may see many motivational videos, you may listen to various motivational stuff, but, until you motivate yourself (self-motivation, I would call it) nothing’s gonna work ever!
Praise yourself, appreciate yourself for the small things you achieve, make yourself feel worthy, it’s you who can raise your self-worth, and you are capable of doing it very efficiently! I have faith in you. Yes, you, the one reading this right now. You are much more than what you think of yourself, you were born to be great, to be whatever you want, and most importantly, to be happy and satisfied. There is an abundance of good feelings, good things, good vibes, waiting for you to open your closed doors so that they can fill you up. Positivity and happiness are always loitering around you, constantly trying to seep into you, your closed doors are a hindrance to them. Open up your doors, expose yourself to these good vibes, let them seep in, let them heal you, let them lift up your soul…. And most importantly, heal your self….
Read Also – Reasons Why Dogs Are Angels Sent From Heaven!
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Although I’m a Science student, I love writing. My interest in reading gave rise to an interest in writing. I love to express my views through my writings and am always happy to help people by providing important and useful information. I write on crazy topics that grab the curiosity of the reader. I’m an optimist and have a very beautiful view about life. Life is a gift, use it wisely.